mayseek life

it was a very good year...

2010-12-31T18:15:00.019-06:00

as 2010 dissolves and the new year approaches i reflect on the many joyful moments that have occurred, i am happy to be alive.

january 2010..... took nate to see cloudgate dancers for his 23rd bday( we last went 10 years ago for his 13th bday!)

set intention for business dream combining travel, and gathering treasures to sell.

returned to the splendor of st marteen ( as beautiful as i remembered in 1983!)

spent spring moments in the northwoods

lovely bday at japonais

helped nate to get his condo in the west loop.

maya graduates hphs

summer at yuendumu art center

sydney family

mom/daughter bonding(tattoo's all around)

monthly foodie opportunities

yo yo ma concert

counting crows/ augustana

poi dog pondering

maya starts uw madison (go badgers)

my hours alone on burnham lake

grand canyon and sedona trip

laughing with my mom

new york trip( no more takashimaya!)

hearing poet naomi shihab nye

brings us back to winter in the northwoods

i look forward to the possibilities in 2011!

time to begin (again)

2010-05-05T12:17:00.000-05:00

waiting to thaw

2010-03-04T12:57:00.002-06:00

today, thankfully , the sun is out. it does lift my spirits, and lifting is what they needed. i'm unsure why i am feeling so frozen- so many dreams recently and i'm just seeming to get charged up- then comes the stall.... so with some deep breaths, i'll focus on what's going right and all that i'm grateful for- i'm tired of thinking i'm not enough and having a "what's the use?" attitude. i do realize that i haven't taken the time to simply look around and behold the amazing reality of life and the creative expression that time in the studio gives me is missing. yesterday was the first time in awhile that i swung by the beach (maybe there's reason to feel frozen) and got in touch with joy. sometime is can be so easy.
ps. life really is like a roller coaster- up, down, up, down, up........(i am glad the ride is still going)

last sunset of 2009

2009-12-31T18:25:00.003-06:00

i enjoyed the time spent gathering the highlights of the past year. i got to re-live the experiences in a way, colored by time and enhanced by memory. also helps in looking forward to 2010, and focus in on what it is i'd like to do more of....

peak moments included:

trips to-

*cabo

*india- i can never be the same

*florida

*montreal

*thailand

*new york(tickertape parade for the yankees and nogucci museum)

concerts-

*pink martini

*jojn legend

*elvis costello

*leonard cohen

nate's graduation from iu

contact lenses-

i now can see without glasses again!

time spent up north at burnham lake-

time in the woods and caneoing refreshes my spirit

30th anniversary-

where did the time go?

add some great restaurants, plays, women's group, goji bars, and new love- salted carmel cupcakes and my life is pretty damn good!

john legend is soul full

2009-07-22T13:55:00.002-05:00

when i'm taken-i can't get enough.....

Grammy-Winning Soul Musician John Legend at UPenn Commencement: "A Commitment to Truth Requires a Commitment to Social Justice"

Shared via AddThis

the blessing of music

2009-07-22T11:16:00.005-05:00

john legend and india arie last night at ravinia... i feel moved to tears as i recall the beautiful visions and the sound of the music of these two talents. both write songs that are from the heart and put them out in their personal styles.

india reminded me "i am not my hair"and john that we are "ordinary people."

summer... finally

2009-07-15T12:04:00.009-05:00

had a wonderful evening simply sitting outside and just be-ing....spent some long overdue time weeding and cleaning the yard during the day , and it was a fine reward.

it's been a wonderful spring....

2009-06-09T20:44:00.006-05:00

watching the many college commencement stories on the news lately has made me especially optimistic and light hearted......at IU for nate's recent graduation(woooooohooo!!!) we got to hear the honorable michael kirby, a retired australian judge of the highest court -who began his affiliation with the school when he became aware of dr. kinseys research years ago. his talk was inspirational and courageous.

it really has been a long four years- i'm sure i learned as much as nathan. so, one down and two to go.

it doesn't matter

2009-06-02T20:09:00.005-05:00

india, march 2009

whatever the reasons or stories that i tell myself about why it takes so long to get back here...it doesn't matter, i got back. the dr. suess message ""Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." just seems to fit.

looking back at 2008....

2008-12-31T18:32:00.005-06:00

though i often get blue at this point in winter- if i look back over the year, there were some wonderful experiences

*last new year's cruise with family

*time spent in northern wisconsin on burnham lake

*trip to magical morocco

*seeing the dali lama at indiana university

*showing my work at artroplis in chicago and the molloy gallery in california

*riding the maid of the mist again in niagra falls

*wonderous skies, full moons and shooting stars

*workshop at anderson ranch in coloradao

*great concerts -eddie vedder,rem,david byrne, the wailers

*and maybe the best of all, barack obama being elected as president!

i am grateful to be alive.

ready to face the future

2008-11-07T09:27:00.002-06:00

when i realized that barack obama was elected to be the next president- i said , "this is one of the happiest days of my life." i then gave deep thought to that statement- and yes, i am sure that it is true! i look forward to travel outside the country and will be proud to say i am from america.

hear my voice....

2008-11-04T10:48:00.002-06:00

i have long felt that barack is exactly the leader our country needs...

thank you david byrne...

2008-10-28T07:21:00.003-05:00

for the inspiration and evening full of sensory delight. a simply fantastic show and one that had me up and moving.

fall glory and self

2008-10-13T10:32:00.004-05:00

the chicago botanic garden is 5 minutes away- and i go through cycles of getting there 3 times a week to once in three months...this is happily a time of frequent visits. the light, color, and texture of this balloon cottonbrush plant held me captive for some time.

working with the "block"

2008-10-11T19:15:00.004-05:00

accepting that what's going on could simply be a form of "writer's block" - it has been painful lately feeling something is "wrong " with me.... feels better and i remember the miracle of possibilities when i realize i can simply do my best to continue to "just do it". sure isn't the first time and may not be the last. approaching my work table has been overwhelming- just today, i will try and stay with the 'block" and be ok with it! will even continue the creative exercises suggested.

happiness

2008-08-19T21:48:00.009-05:00

"the word happiness would lose it's meaning if it were not balanced by sadness..."

carl jung

this past week has been full with both... from the joy of a sox game( i love a baseball game with my family- especially when the sox are in first place!) to the sadness i felt saying goodbye to nick when i left carbondale's southern illinois university and took that long drive home. alone.

clay workshop in the mountains(wow)

2008-07-15T13:03:00.007-05:00

i just spent the last two weeks in the snowmass area of colorado at the anderson ranch taking a clay workshop and it was really just what i needed to re-inspire my spirit and get the juices flowing.....

the area is beautiful, the weather fantastic (no humidity), warm days-cool nights. view from my room

enjoying the mountains

and clay, clay, clay

now i'm trying to hold on to the feeling.....

phot friday- religion

2008-06-27T21:30:00.003-05:00

saw matisyahu ( with opening act-my fav- the wailers) who is an orthodox jew that performs reggae/hip hop/beatbox music- and couldn't help but contemplate the many ways one can express their religious feelings. very interesting. so many young men in this particular community seemed to use the music as a connection with culture and religion and identify with the broader popular culture.

why i'm glad i carry my camera....

2008-06-25T21:45:00.006-05:00

as i upload some pictures from the last few days- i am thankful for the camera that rattles around the bottom of my purse. it gets quite a workout. as we drove into city to see nate i was taken with the beauty of the sky -both, bright clouds and dark intense storm clouds held the same space.... a lot like nate himself.
i found myself waiting for maya, while she tried on clothes as she gets ready to leave for a month in italy. this is a familiar vantage point- i watch her try on life, hoping for the best. patience is my mantra. (when i remember).

today i took rosie out for lunch. it has been almost a year since she has moved from her house into assisted living arrangements. she seems to be settling in and viewing this as "just the way it is". i am continuing to learn from her. i honor her 97 years of living.

another summer begins

2008-06-20T20:36:00.004-05:00

this was the day, 13 years ago -when i hit my bottom. i got sober on the first day of summer in 1995. i realize in general i see things differently now and i am grateful for the shift in my life. not for a moment do i take this for granted. there are still many days when my experiences are so confusing and uncomfortable that i have to work hard at not taking what was a familiar path of action and have a drink to ease(or enhance) the sensation of life.

i see the moon...

2008-06-18T10:47:00.003-05:00

at the end of the day- it seems like each day is going sooooo fast. when i'm lucky, i spot the sights that slow me down and help me just be.

feast for the senses

2008-06-10T10:02:00.012-05:00

life is truly full of incredible sensations (both delightful and painful) i am basking in a few of the delightful ones of the last two weeks. a long weekend in toronto was an opportunity to eat a strawberry snow globe at the four seasons hotel...........

the gardiner museum devoted to ceramic art was fantastic................

the stores and fashionable window designs were spectacular.............

a return trip to see niagra falls, after 48 years was memorable..........

when i returned home, the joy continued with a concert by r e m. i took nate, and had a fun evening with my oldest son. he is curious, bright, funny and a life -loving young man. though he sure does have some issues to work on -just like the rest of us!

i love music and live concerts !!!!!!!!!!

isn't she lovely.....as she turned 16

2008-05-28T09:16:00.005-05:00

Isn't she lovely
Isn't she wonderfull
Isn't she precious
Less than one minute old
I never thought through love we'd be
Making one as lovely as she
But isn't she lovely made from love
Isn't she pretty
Truly the angel's best
Boy, I'm so happy
We have been heaven blessed
I can't believe what God has done
through us he's given life to one
But isn't she lovely made from love ......
stevie wonder

and then there's the beauty of simple sights- the kitchen sink made a stunning still life scene.
today, everything appears beautiful.

easing back in...

2008-05-22T23:47:00.002-05:00

when there's too much to say, i get quite. to ease back in, let me say the waters of the bahamas that i feasted on last week helped with the anxiety/fear/and pain of the oral surgery i had the day after we returned. four days later- i am healing and of course get more lessons in life. while i try and grasp the lessons -i remember the incredible color of the ocean.
i have been trying to process the good fortune, of the recent art show, that i was a part of at the artropolis in chicago. the possibilities i had always imagined, seem to be occurring, and i find myself uncertain and questioning my talent -am i good enough? happily, i am appreciating the situation (most often) and breathing fully and just doing the best i can.....
with the boys home from college and maya's 2nd year of high school coming to an end, i get diverted from my thoughts and self doubts. i am truly enjoying the peace i feel of having them sleeping in their beds at home.

monday mantra

2008-04-14T09:07:00.003-05:00

our actions follow our thoughts-

today my thoughts will be conscious and in a positive direction!

moody monday- shadowy

2008-04-07T22:02:00.000-05:00

shadowy:
–adjective,
1. resembling a shadow in faintness, slightness, etc.: shadowy outlines. 2. unsubstantial, unreal, or illusory: shadowy preoccupations. 3. abounding in shadow; shady: a shadowy path. 4. enveloped in shadow. 5. casting a shadow.

what i like most about blogging....

2008-04-05T12:12:00.006-05:00

a nice thing about having this blog is the ease at "looking back" over time and maybe noticing things that are patterns or provide insight. this morning i went back to april of last year and interesting enough i seemed to be experiencing a similar blue phase- i could have written the same posts and simply changed the date/year! also similar is that i had taken a wonderful trip in march and then found april to be a crash ,slowly coming back to some sense of balance by my birthday in mid april...... while writing this, i just pulled up april 2006 and i am amazed to read 4/7/06 is a post labelled the blues!!!! same scene-early april struggling to to get on track by mid april. nice to know i have and do come out of the blue and find the rose color glasses - to value the differences is another reminder that it's all good.

another thing about blogging that is so great is- i get lost in the possibilities of information- i intend to answer one question and get led to unimaginable questions/thoughts , see visuals, read poets, feel emotions and am amazed by the connections. i read an old comment from last years birthday, by kate ,( whose blog i had forgotten though really enjoyed) and was surprised to see this post on moroccan mail as i went to catch up with her thoughts.... i like entering a door and never really knowing what is on the other side.

as if this wasn't enough, the most moving haiku of nancy. each one i read i send her a thank you. her imagery and life force are a gift.

"far from home"- photo fri

2008-04-04T08:04:00.000-05:00

the beauty of morocco- the high atlas mountains. the theme of photo fri is another opportunity to go through the 1080 images i took. it takes my mind off searching for the mysterious foul smell in the kitchen (which is getting worse, and not going away!), my childs anxiety and fear, and my own anxiety and fear. as in the past ,time is my friend and my "funk" does seem to be easing. trying to keep things simple- one breath at a time.

missing the donkeys....

2008-03-30T11:07:00.000-05:00

photo friday-"emotions"

2008-03-28T10:18:00.001-05:00

feeling connected.....

the treasure chest is full

2008-03-26T12:52:00.004-05:00

i am full, i left with one suitcase and returned with two. yes, this is quite a haul -but even better is the full rich memories i now have of glorious morocco. the country was incredibly beautiful- the people, the land, the wisdom. it exceeded my dreams many times over. the walking tour was a fantastic way to travel- walks of approx 2 miles each day found us in remote landscapes /villages that were off the beaten path. as i sift through the 1080 images of this unique country it is impossible to keep myself from smiling and feeling giddy with delight! more to come.....

au revoir

2008-03-13T05:09:00.006-05:00

i think about this ring often....i like the aquamarine stone, the unique circle in a square setting, and the fact that it is on the finger of someone i love. it is one of the treasures i can simply think of and feel good. it inspires me with it's beauty. it is important also that i don't own it- it keeps me searching for the qualities i am drawn to. i am reminded of this search as i leave today for morocco. i am searching for treasures- sights, sounds, sensations and yes a few souvoniers from this far away land. i am grateful to travel and relish each step of the journey- from the decision, to the packing craziness (such a wonderful opportunity to examine what i feel i need to be comfortable out of my reality and trust that most of it is not really needed but a fear of sorts)
to the trip itself and all that i discover about life. love to all.

"fuzzy" ....photo friday

2008-02-29T13:37:00.004-06:00

this radiant man, the dali lama appears fuzzy- yet he was most clear as he communicated his message on compassion as the source of peace, at indiana university last fall. i was fortunate to take nate since he is attending school there. though our seats where far from the stage- his joyful energy reached us easily. i still reflect on the event often, and use it to remind myself of the value of drawing on my compassion when i am suffering. when i feel it for myself i can feel it for everyone with less effort.

photo friday-"what is that?"

2008-02-09T16:22:00.001-06:00

for some reason i kept this shot of a sculpture-chair-thingie that was the focus of a small garden outside a home in chicago. it peaked my curiosity- it is a lounge chair on metal legs with leafy appendages coming out of the back.....i remember thinking "what is that?"

travel high

2008-02-03T20:52:00.000-06:00

i'm deep in acquainting myself with the possibilities of what morocco could be. watching films, finding the art community, reading native authors, becoming intoxicated with the colors-patterns-and design. though it will be just 10 days...it will allow me to experience the unfamiliar and open my mind to another reality. this "pre-trip" is a favorite time, my imagination takes off and it seems like i am more able to absorb cultural aspects of far off places.

what lies ahead......

2008-01-29T21:55:00.000-06:00

so many ways to view what seems to be"just down the road." yesterday i felt i knew what was in the distance and where i was going, and it turns out that ride unfolded without any twists or obstacles. i am trying to see the beauty as i'm traveling and want to be open to the unplanned detours and enjoy the ride! happily, the road is leading to morocco(!) in march and i am deep in the exploring mode of all that is moroccan.

photo friday-"the machine"

2008-01-25T12:40:00.000-06:00

we took an excursion from the ship last month and fred and i rode segways, while the kids chose the zip line through the tree tops trip. though our activity was a lot tamer- it was incredibly fun and i will look for another opportunity to ride this machine. i don't think the segways ever did take off as hoped by it's backers, but i do see some police riding them in chicago. they are also used in city tours here as well.

now i know why.....

2008-01-17T14:46:00.000-06:00

i've been feeling this way about going into my studio to start working. after having dear house guests since halloween, then going away with the family for winter break- i have been unable to force myself to get back to work. i haven't been talking very nice to myself, calling myself names like lazy and no-talent...it wasn't feeling at all good and i knew i needed to try another way. after gently convincing myself to stay with it and just begin to straighten things up, i realized the major dumping i had done to accommodate living arrangements. no wonder unconsciously i knew that i would have to do a major reorganization project just to get to square one. so happily i have begun and feel the energy stirring.....

mountain

2008-01-11T14:45:00.001-06:00

the photo friday prompt is mountain..... this image of a glacier in alaska comes to mind. one of the most gorgeous landscapes i have seen.

full of possibilities

2008-01-10T12:59:00.001-06:00

feeling the excitement of karen's impending deliverence! i am overwhelmed with joy when i feel so amazed by life.

new year cruise

2008-01-08T23:48:00.000-06:00

even if it wasn't my perfect vacation, i am grateful to have been on the cruise with my family. there were continual scenes of delight everywhere i looked- the water, sun, islands, a rainbow when i least expected it, thousands of champaigne glasses twinkling at midnight, crazy carved watermelons, and a night sky full of shooting stars.... i thought there would be more "relaxing"........

agora

2007-12-29T00:06:00.000-06:00

this is a sculpture by magdalena abakanowicz titled agora that is at the south end of grant park in chicago. i find it a powerful piece composed of many bronze torso/leg figures each distinct yet gathered in the city. for some reason it came to mind when i again tried to sit down and express my thoughts via this blog....i've been stuck lately- questioning my words, my ideas - my self. the power and simplicity of this creative act has encouraged/ inspired me to make a movement and not have an expectation. so i begin again -attempting to simply enjoy expressing a thought.

just the beginning...

2007-12-13T21:17:00.000-06:00

it's been cold and kind of gray lately, but if i look for a moment the incredible beauty is always there. the snow and long, glistening icicles make this time visually striking. i do appreciate how festive the downtown center of this area begins to look. and that sliver of a moon tonight is a feast for my senses.

where did the time go?

2007-12-02T13:45:00.000-06:00

they arrived on october 28th, and left on november 30th- my cousin and her two daughters, came from australia and filled my house with happiness, love, and a little madness at times. like our previous visits, the joy is matched in intensity by the sorrow of the parting. maybe the distance helps to keep each moment valuable and precious when we are together. this has been an unusual and special year because i had visited her in sydney this past march. lucky us, to connect twice in such a short time. i am full of inspiration and possibility, my well is full for the time being............. so many moments to reflect on--

emerald gets to try trick or treating on halloween....
the unexpected snowfall up north....

a glorious change of color......

my boys home on thanksgiving.....

mothers,daughters,sisters,grandmas, cousins, neices,aunts.....

nicole and her namesake nick.......

the swell season concert , Glen Hansard of The Frames and Marketa Irglova, stars of the film, ONCE,

fine dining-closing our eyes and savouring. the slow movement has nothing on our 5 hour dinner. to experience a meal at alinea is magical

the joy of meeting "cosima eileen" who shares a birthdate with my son nick. some things are just meant to be.

bloodlines

2007-11-18T09:15:00.000-06:00

i sat down to to update and found myself reading the blogs of those i miss. time has been used and i can now just jot down afew words about being right in the middle of a month long visit with dear cousins from australia. things i am aware of are :
*how wonderful life is when deep connection is present
* mothering young children is incredibly challenging at times-i am amazed i was in the position of directing three children under five at one time. this is a word of honor to all the dedication it takes to parent. i forgot how many "whys?" there are to be answered in a day.
*i am excited(yet tired just thinking about it) that the boys are returning home for thanksgiving week and we will host the dinner for 23.(i should be cleaning or something right now!)
*i am grateful to be open to all the experiences of my family- both pleasurable and painful.

pausing....

2007-11-10T09:10:00.000-06:00

slower to write than usual- mostly because the computer is in the room that my cousins are using while they visit. we will head up to the northwoods of wisconsin today, just a couple of days to breathe in slowly and watch the night sky.

awareness

2007-10-26T12:56:00.000-05:00

after spending awhile in a state of uncomfortable judging of others(specifically my family) i was able to get past the guilt of feeling not compassionate enough and took myself down to the beach for a few moments to see if things would ease. i have had many insights and found answers to my uncertanties at this place before -and again, did find relief in the colors and sensations i experienced there. i found i couldn't hold on to the stories i was clinging to and fully take in the experience of what i was seeing at the same time. i actually felt the shifting of one experience(the visual earth) to the next( the story of my family). i again realized my choice to be with either one. and by spending time in the pleasurable grounding sensations of the beach i also was able to remember the spirits of my family and know the "stories " are changing and they are so much more than the current circumstances.

i (heart) new york

2007-10-24T17:54:00.000-05:00

you'll have to believe me -here's jon stewart helping his young son pick out a book at barnes&noble in union square park. i couldn't get closer without feeling like a paparazzo. hard to say what came over me-i watch him nightly on the daily show and appreciate his humor - i was surprised that i was the only one seeming to get excited. we had a great few days in new york, with weather in the upper 70's - skaters breezed through puddles at rockefeller plaza. good for walking, sitting and people watching. one more quick trip this weekend to indiana university- we will pack a lot into one day...... i have tickets to see the dali lama who will speak at the school from noon til two -then watch nate play baseball at four- then turn it around for the 4 hour trip home.
my darling cousin arrives from sydney with her daughters on sunday, and i'm already giddy with anticipation!!

"real life" -photo friday

2007-10-12T08:19:00.000-05:00

moving through life..........

understanding and actions

2007-10-11T11:25:00.000-05:00

http://www.charlierose.com/shows/2007/09/21/1/a-discussion-about-the-film-into-the-wild i recently watched this interesting show where charlie rose interviewed sean penn and eddie vedder with regards to the movie "into the wild". i'd heard of the book,but after this interveiw had to run out and get it. i read the book quickly( found it hard to put down) and it has given me much to ponder- don't have many answers to the questions it raises for me but it got me curious and excited about the choices one makes that determine their lifestyle.
i then read "catcher in the rye", as that escaped me in high school-i don't know how since it seems like it is a mandatory read. i was moved by the different perspective/ mindset of "holden" when i was still comsumed with the "chris mccandless" attitude and way of experiencing the world( from the former book). i can't wait to see the movie "into the wild" ..... (the photo of sean penn was taken at the march on wasington dc earlier this year)

easing suffering.....

2007-10-08T10:18:00.000-05:00

this past weekend, i was fortunate to attend a seminar by dzigar kongtrul rinpoche at the beautiful shamhbala mountain center in colodado. my spiritual life continues to grow with the teachings i have heard from the shamhbala organization, and teachers like pema chodron and sakyong mipham rinpoche. the opportunity to listen and comtemplate his words and meditate for long periods of time was a treat. i had some issues with the rituals that groups follow - reminds me of the catholic grammar school and church i attended many years ago. as i return to my real world, i immediately get many chances to observe my knee-jerk reactions to others and experiences in my life. the area of red feather lake was 2.5 hours northeast of denver and 2000ft higher! i struggled with some altitude headaches but the landscape was gorgeous and worth it. experienced cold evenings and expected snow. today in chicago it is 87 degrees -a new record high.

boys to men

2007-09-25T15:37:00.000-05:00

sadly, nick has mono at southern il university...he left home with strep throat and has been under the weather since he got there. he was diagnosed last week he's been zapped of energy and even unable to ride his bike to class. hoping he could conserve energy and continue with school i drove his car down to him( 6 hours) and the health center issued special parking.
seeing him without energy and in distress is very difficult. i was just getting used to him living away from home, and now i just want him home to take care of him! since i stayed at a hotel in order to get things done for him on monday, he stayed with me and i got to nurture him and he spent the night in a comfy bed with some peace and quiet.

i shopped for soups, snacks, vitamins, tea and other neccessities -he then drove me to the train station for the long ride home. my heart was aching as i left my "young man son" . i was moved by the couple of hugs he gave me as we parted... they were deep and communicated his appreciation and the courage to try and take care of himself.

amtrak brings me back ....

falls approach

2007-09-20T16:00:00.000-05:00

as i drove a few blocks from my home today, i noticed the air becoming thicker-almost smokey. i noticed fog rolling in as i got closer to the lake. it was so distinct of a seperation over the town that i was drawn to go to the lakefront and take a look...... as i drove down the winding road to the beach i was met by a thick fog and a noticable temperature drop. i was grateful for the experience and happy i took the "scenic route". there were a few people fishing that i could barely make out until i was very close.

on the return home an hour or so later the sun was strong and the green of late summer was intense with yellowing tips on the trees. this was a good reminder for me (today i especially need it) to be observant of the earth , it makes my life rich when i am aware of it's brilliance.

moody monday-"sugary"

2007-09-17T17:57:00.000-05:00

2. sweet; excessively sweet.

sprinlkes on ice cream and cheek. this sweety, emerald- will be visiting from australia for the month of november. i am so excited. my darling cousin nicole (her mother) is arriving with both daughters. i will get to meet little "cosima eileen" who was born on june 17th( my son nick's birthday-how fitting as he was named in nicoles honor).

photo friday- "purple"

2007-09-07T14:04:00.000-05:00

as i push through my angst while preparing for my first outdoor art show...i am reminded that there is great pleasure in ordinary sightings. whatever occurs will be incredible because that's just the way life is...... i think i'm ready. the show is the lakeview fine art festival
(see more purple at photo friday)

photo friday-"insignificant"

2007-08-31T13:02:00.000-05:00

yet extraordinary..........

check others at photo friday site

breaking up the blogjam with blues

2007-08-30T09:42:00.000-05:00

i can relate to this definition :" Blogjam, the condition of being backed up with too many ideas to comment on and not enough time to write on one's blog." seeing bb king last night -i can't help but write how incredible he was. the energy of the band and bb playing the guitar was a powerful experience! his voice is truly memorable. actually, this is quite the week- i saw rufus wainwright on sat.- bb last night, and tomorrow i will take my mom to see tony bennet (a birthday gift to her) i am blessed. the last few years i have found watching musicians that i love(with good seats!) is a religious experience for me.

that was then, and this is now.....

2007-08-21T08:25:00.000-05:00

it seemed so gradual- now i'm feeling the reality of time. here are the boys, nate and nick. first, as nate was on his way to kindergarten class and nick still home with me. fast forward to last week as we take nick to southern illinois university in carbondale. we returned home and nate left the next day, to begin his 3rd year at indiana university. to my surprise i have moped around the house -crying at times feeling such a deep sadness. happily, time is softening the intensity- and i realize it is sadness for "how things were". what i hope and wish for them is courage to be themselves, happiness in sharing time with others outside of their circle, gratitude for the blessing of continued education and most importantly love of life.

paradox

2007-08-12T08:42:00.000-05:00

i want to sit an gaze out the window, and yet can't stop feeling lazy......

American Heritage Dictionary - par·a·dox (pār'ə-dŏks') Pronunciation Key n.
1)A seemingly contradictory statement that may nonetheless be true: the paradox that standing is more tiring than walking.
2)One exhibiting inexplicable or contradictory aspects: "The silence of midnight, to speak truly, though apparently a paradox, rung in my ears" (Mary Shelley).
3)An assertion that is essentially self-contradictory, though based on a valid deduction from acceptable premises.
4)A statement contrary to received opinion.

i am feeling deep in the "paradox" of life.........i am isolating myself lately, yet feeling lonely and wanting to connect. i'm wanting to accept my body and feeling the self- loathing creep up and continue to gain weight, i love to see my finished art work - yet feel have too drag myself to the work table, i want to be with my kids yet resent that i feel they want me around if i can do something for them. the list goes on.......

may i come to the end of this day grateful for having had another day, and looking forward to another tomorrow. i do know i'm not alone.

Arabic:
تَناقُض
Chinese (Simplified):
似非而是的论点，自相矛盾的话
Chinese (Traditional):
似非而是的論點，自相矛盾的話
Czech:
paradox
Danish:
paradoks
Dutch:
paradox
Estonian:
paradoks
Finnish:
paradoksi
French:
paradoxe
German:
das Paradox
Greek:
παραδοξολογία
Hungarian:
paradoxon
Icelandic:
þverstæða, þversögn
Indonesian:
paradoks
Italian:
paradosso
Japanese:
逆説
Korean:
역설(逆說)
Latvian:
paradokss
Lithuanian:
paradoksas
Norwegian:
paradoks
Polish:
paradoks
Portuguese (Brazil):
paradoxo
Portuguese (Portugal):
paradoxo
Romanian:
paradox
Russian:
парадокс
Slovak:
paradox
Slovenian:
paradoks
Spanish:
paradoja
Swedish:
paradox
Turkish:
paradoks

two homes

2007-08-09T16:32:00.000-05:00

i was able to spend the last week up in the northwoods of wisconsin again- a few days with fred and a few days alone...i have started a journal that i decided will stay there- and that is an enjoyable project, many insights are gathered by referring to the book after the ideas/images are recorded. i have become aware of how i come apart before i settle into the rhythm of the woods. too bad the days are few and far between that i am up there because this "undoing" takes up time- i much rather like the ease that kicks in after a few days- unfortunately, it's then time to return home. still, i am very grateful to have any time at all in that environment.

in going through my photos of last week-this was the break down:
9- clouds on the drive home
10- lake/trees
14- lily pads
3-flowers
4-frogs
40 hummingbirds

since it is a 5 hour drive home, there is plenty of time to transition back into the "real world." on this return trip the cloud formations, colors, and how low they were was most intriguing. i read cormac mccarthy's "the road", while there and it made the contrast of the landscape he describes in this bleak story even more extreme and powerful. it was a good story and gave much to ponder.

now home again ,i am preparing for the difficult process of sending both boys off to college next week....i am amazed at how time has passed and this is the new phase of our family life. i am feeling nostalgic and blue.

life, 5 hours north....

2007-07-26T16:13:00.000-05:00

after a week in wisconsin's northwoods i am trying to schedule the next trip back....timing , playing tricks as it can, finds me longing to return to our cabin- and the kids crying that i can't force them to go!! in my family of five, i alone enjoy spending hours adrift in my canoe, or sitting in the woods just listening to the sounds. that's just the way it is....... oh well, i have learned to take care of myself (mostly) and seldom mind being alone. the small town of minocqua(as most of the lake towns) have a water ski club called the "minocqua-bats" and show time is sunday, monday, weds evenings. a coffee shop serving cappuccino and a french bakery in town provide a touch of home. the town offers a nice compliment to the quiet of the woods.

everythings a little off....

2007-07-11T18:45:00.000-05:00

unloaded a kiln this morning, and every shelf had a blown out piece of work on it!! i don't generally rush my claywork to dry and rarely have this problem. unfortunately i did this time -and i had so much completed in this load......so started the day. from then on most of my experiences had a kick that wasn't easy to take - conversations weren't easy and tended to be conflictual and emotions were confusing and often intense. i did know that each moment offered me many ways of reacting, and i'm happy to say almost half the time i streched beyond the knee-jerk response and used some patience or grace to respond in a peaceful manner. i'm still working on the other half reactions . ( i am grateful for the most incredible clouds and skyscape- how could i not be peaceful when i had the good sense to gaze outside?)

long overdue -heading up to the lake

2007-07-10T21:30:00.000-05:00

spc-water, summers glorious element
burnham lake is such a peaceful spot- a small, no wake(no motors) lake in the northwoods of wisconsin. we have a small cabin there and this season haven't seen it yet! timing is such that with the kids so independent- i can no longer herd them in my planned direction. so, next week there is a lull in the activity-maybe the boys can get a couple of days off work- i know i'm taking the dog and who ever is willing/able and heading north.....countdown.

4th of july-2007

2007-07-04T14:27:00.000-05:00

nick and i did a quick overnight in new york and finally got to see spring awakening.....i am in heaven!! i got these great tickets for my birthday back in april and have been waiting for this event. nick, having just graduated highschool, is living through the topics/issues around which the play revolves.(though i must admit, i'm still living through a few of the issues myself) i especially love the music and the energy of the choreography. if you have a chance see this play!

i am glad to have spent some time with my boy- before he leaves home to start college. it seems like yesterday i went through this "letting go" of nate..... but i still have a month of him at home. we got home in time to see the fireworks. a fitting way to end a spectacular time.

fortune says,"you will live a long life"

2007-06-27T07:24:00.000-05:00

i sat across from rosie, in a restaurant in china town the other day, and when i saw this picture (i am in the mirror to her left) i realized that i am observing her and seeing myself ! i am able to learn about the possibilities of how life changes - and the fears , events, and emotional intensities that can arise. at 96 years old, in the process of moving from her home of 40 years- life is stressing her, and she is overwhelmed often. i have mentioned rosie before and i am lucky enough to provide her with some company when she needs it. it is getting harder to witness her fear without wishing it where different. we started out for a drive downtown to see millenium park in chicago and the conversation bounced from from how incredible the changes to the city are, to how awful change is...... she repeated, " oh my, look at all the changes- i hate change!" then she'd add, "oh well...." this went on the entire afternoon. at one point she suggested we go have lunch in china town, she brightened up at the end and instructed me to read our fortune cookies wisdom. her's read, "you have had many great accomplishments." amen!

rocky mountain high

2007-06-21T15:30:00.000-05:00

i spent the last the last five days in vail colorado at a friends 60th birthday party. she gifted 30 of her freinds and sisters with this trip! her generous nature and open heart is overwhelming to me. we hiked, white-water rafted, dined out, had spa time, and saw the wailers(as in bob marley) at an outdoor concert. i am just coming down from this dream like state (my kids are seeing to it that i remember what life usually is like!). when things couldn't seem to get better my friend who is a wonderful painter had us choose a painting of hers ...another gift for the party goers!!

"glass-ic"

2007-06-14T07:19:00.000-05:00

i am lucky to live near ravinia festival and last night i saw philip glass (an all time favorite) and his new production of leonard cohen's book of longing. there was a discussion prior to the performance and he spoke of finding the "rhythm of the language".

"where i go when i go there"....... is a line from spring awakening (i am going in july to see this play!) and it indicates the specialness of the zone that some things help take me to. it was incredible.....pure glass!

holding on to a moment

2007-06-12T20:43:00.000-05:00

i spent a short time lying on my bed this afternoon- i experienced a moment that is staying with me and still bringing a smile to my face. first, the weather today is perfect, sunny, mild and the air is gently moving- helping to carry the sounds of summer. it was late afternoon, nick had friends in the yard and they were barbequing, the cicadas were humming, the young neighbor children were laughing next door...the breeze brought all the sounds to me....i closed my eyes and saw incredible rasberry colored shapes in my minds eye.... the focus of my mind played amongst the sounds and images and sensations- my heart was full and i was overcome with joy.

purity...photo friday

2007-06-08T07:41:00.000-05:00

" purity"... containing nothing that does not properly belong .

poppy time

2007-06-03T16:57:00.000-05:00

i enjoy the short time of the bloom, the vibrant graceful flower is the second to arrive. first came the lilacs. they too, seem to be fleeting. next will be the peonies, whose tight buds are just now loosening.

i am breathing in the joy of these beauties....

time flies (and so do cicadas)

2007-05-30T08:48:00.000-05:00

this lacrosse team is moving on, seasons over and it's on to the next chapter in life. another son graduates high school, and i am struck by the passage of time. after the wonderful ceremony

the class is taken on "grad night", games at the enchanted castle and then at 3:30am they are brought down to the beach-where parents gathered to create a bon-fire (dj and donuts) and the class shares watching a sunrise.....i find it a moving ending- and for the second time, find myself touched deeply by this poignant experience.

as we arrived home this morning, at 5:45am! the cicadas are busy on their incredible journey. the last time there were this many was 17 years ago at nicks 1st birthday..... indeed, time flies.

9:45 pm i see the moon...

2007-05-21T21:48:00.000-05:00

and the moon sees me. what a wonderous sight.

earthscapes

2007-05-20T21:44:00.000-05:00

one highlight from the recent vegas trip was the view of the earth on the flight home. this imagery is inspiring and helps motivate me to create work in clay.

amber (as in waves of grain)

2007-05-12T08:26:00.000-05:00

this weeks photo friday is "amber", after pondering the word i remembered a tuscan image.

i am so grateful for that trip. it provides me with a vast collection of imagery. what a blessing it is to travel.

spring= lilacs ( poetry thursday)

2007-05-10T06:42:00.000-05:00

O sweet spontaneous
O sweet spontaneous
earth how often have
the
doting
fingers of
prurient philosophers pinched
and
poked
thee,
has the naughty thumb
of science prodded
thy
beauty . how
often have religions taken
thee upon their scraggy knees
squeezing and
buffeting thee that thou mightest conceive
gods
(but
true
to the incomparable
couch of death thy
rhythmic
lover
thou answerest
them only with
spring)

e.e. cummings

rosie at 96....

2007-05-09T18:54:00.000-05:00

i've been spending some time with my husbands aunt rose lately. at 96, she had a recent bout of depression. she lost her last two close friends this past year, and had cataract surgery which has left her vision blurry. she said she felt in an abyss and questioned if life was worth living any longer. when she shared this with a much younger niece (who was afraid) she was taken to the hospitol and spent a few days in the psych ward. poor dear, is now feeling ashamed for the depression and can't believe her life has "come to this". she really is quite a woman- lives in her own small home and until recently (maybe the last five years) had still exercised and drove around town keeping active in her temple. we have convinced her to move into a retiremnt home or some living arrangement that offers activities and community. she is hesitant to leave her home , but just spent a few weeks in a facility to see what it was like. she liked the food and the apartment but said "there are so many old people there." and she confided that being around them she is starting to forget and struggle to keep a grip on things.she has returned home for the week, but will try a new facility soon. i enjoy hearing her stories from the past. she was one of nine children and though she had married (widowed for 30 years) she never had children of her own. she is a teacher of sorts to me now, and i think we are closer in this stage than we ever had been throughout the years.

long weekend visiting the er

2007-05-01T08:11:00.000-05:00

began thursday with nick breaking his hand during a lacrosse game....very tough lessons as he was starting defense and the team has an incredible 8-1 record. it was the highlight in his life when other areas are not as easy right now. (i have found myself thinking more than a few times lately-how an incident is affecting my kids life and know that in a few years the occurence will have had an impact.) then we revisited the emergency room sunday night when maya who is smiling in the photo (though she wasn't before or shortly after!) had to have an earring removed from the infected cartilidge of her ear. very painful, but the shot of lidacaine was helpful. so, i look forward to escaping with fred while he attends a convention at the red rock resort outside of las vegas.....sunshine here i come. lucky maya will get to come too.

brain whirling

2007-04-24T11:08:00.000-05:00

feels like the teeter- totter is in motion. i am peaceful and in an accepting frame of mind one minute....then the experiences continue and the balance shifts over to the discontent and negative attitude. i love being a mother...i hate being a mother- life is good ....life sucks- i'm lucky to have a car...damn car may have trasmission problems...on and on and on! and then i remember ( in one of the up moments) everything changes. the impermanace concept!! and i feel a true smile.
see more body parts at spc .

bright spots in the numbness

2007-04-18T15:28:00.000-05:00

i have been holding on to the positive sensations that i am experiencing - actually grasping them when i am feeling disoriented, and the unpleasantness/discomfort of society or life takes over. last night, at the highschool was the bi-annual art night event. the last few months where spent contacting artists and inviting them to spend the evening with us and share their work and themselves. it was a lot of work to organize and plan the event- but it was a great evening. here is one of the reasons it was so great, artists like martin soto. what incredible energy he has, and such big heartedeness. keeps me inspired and positive on a day i find myself taking advil because i just want to "feel" better- and then realize advil can not help me feel different, and thats what i want.

seems like yesterday....

2007-04-16T11:48:00.000-05:00

that was then, and this is now-

*sun bringing in the day

*calls from friends to remind me of the times that were precious

*cleaning some clutter and letting go...

*starting a physical plan of wellness

*meditating and journaling

*listening to music -lila downs, paulo conte and paul kelly!!

and it's only 12 noon, what a wonderful way to celebrate my birthday.

coffee at the beach.....

2007-04-11T11:25:00.000-05:00

had to drink my coffee in the car because the sleet/snow was a little too much for me this morning. lake michigan was whipped up and powerful ..the grayish blue-brown of the water was beautiful.

as i head home, i say a prayer for this driver and hope their day gets better. spring in the midwest will be appreciated when it arrives.

"this american life" on tv...it's great.

2007-04-09T08:01:00.000-05:00

as a long time listener to "this american life" on public radio, i wondered how it would translate on tv. i am even more intrigued with the visual show! ira glass is a creative star. he can take the ordinary(and the not so ordinary) and turn out a piece that is contemplative, interesting ,and visually striking. now this is what tv should be! visit this american life to see some clips if you don't have cable.

drawing on a spirited show...

2007-04-05T08:30:00.000-05:00

today i am remembering the fantastic lila downs show at the metro in sydney

-listened to her music today (ordered this ) and was infused with happiness and the urge to dance! she's like that, a beauty with a strong voice and full of joy. it was just meant to be that i saw her "one night only" performance written about on my way to australia....and my sweet cousin got tickets and was up for the adventure. we both loved the show with it's high energy and wonderous sounds. later that week we got the movie "frieda "to spot lila's cameo . life is good. check lila in this you tube bit...

time passing...

2007-04-03T09:45:00.000-05:00

i had my nails done in australia, and as i look at my hands today i get a good reminder that time is indeed passing. as someone whose hands are in clay a good deal of time, my nails are not a focus of mine. i could (and am) looking at this from two different perspectives- in a bluesy way -sad that i can't hold tight on to my recent trip and the joy it brought....and in a more grounded way- to know that as i remove this old polish and start again -the possibilities of new experiences are endless! so i suffer a short time while i grasp the past....and gently release my spirit into today.

beauty below me....

2007-03-29T09:56:00.000-05:00

i am having some adjustment difficulties while i get back into my life as i know it-i am having trouble putting the knowledge of the laws of attraction into place. i have been stuck in the why can't my reality be different??? i know i am more happy when i am believing in the moment, and the choice i have to have reality reflect my desire. so for this day, i will continue to try and remember my power.....and deal with the "issues" in relationship, parenting and crafting my art!

photo friday-"sentimental"

2007-03-26T08:05:00.000-05:00

at home this morning, i am grateful for the experience i have had in australia. spending time with my family, getting to share the daily life happenings- reconnecting and remembering the good-byes. my heart aches at the parting.... but as powerful is my joy. this shot of children in uniforms, on a lovely day, is so typical of the beauty of sydney harbor. the lessons of travel are still occurring- as packing taught me to question "what i really need to take"-unpacking is reminding me of " what i bring back" and where i place these items in my life. monday -a chance to begin again! (more to come on the highlights...)

packing...what if?

2007-03-06T11:43:00.000-06:00

i've got my rose color glasses on, and i gave maya a small charm of rose colored glasses for her to hold on to while i'm gone. again i learned great lessons from packing for the trip (my cravings and facing fears that i might need things with me - help me realize i have what i need without the material items!) this month's self portrait challege should be fun (hate missing it for a couple of weeks). i enjoyed using the pikipimp photo program.

just an observation...

2007-03-02T15:12:00.000-06:00

at lunch the other day, we noticed the little boy with hearphones and a laptop sitting next to us. we observed that he was involved in a program on the screen and was being fed by a woman intermittently, while the adults conversed. the adults would often look at the boy lovingly with smiles. turns out it was his birthday, and soon a cake came out and he blew out the candles. not once did the earphones come off, or the computer screen get put away. this child appeared to be about four years old. as a group of women, all mothers ourselves-something seemed disturbing about this reality. however, we ate, and laughed and continued with our lunch.

at another table was a younger little girl about two years old, playing with a few small toys (and as my friend pointed out-she was eating a crayon- behaving just like a child is supposed to!) we smiled, happy to know that kids are still be kids...then a moment later this family brought out their dvd player and got the child "plugged in" !!! ok i tried hard to record what i saw and not judge the bigger picture here, but i can't. i think what troubles me most is the habits being created at such a young age-as an addict myself - this is frightening to me. not to mention the isolation or disconnection.

5 days and counting...

2007-03-02T06:54:00.000-06:00

been feeling preoccupied lately, i will be traveling to sydney next tuesday. i am grateful for the chance to spent some time with cousins who have brought to life the notion of the word family. i have never traveled alone to visit. it's exhilerating to anticipate time on my own (17 days!)and at the same time i am aprehensive to leave my family on their own (as though they can't get along without me...) so i have been loading up the ipod (18 hours of flying time) and gathering reading options(which i will have to pare down-the amount of books would require an additional seat) and trying to anticipate what they will need while i am gone. what i am also working on right now is staying grounded and breathing into the deep knowing that each moment holds all i am desiring.

ferbuary position to spring

2007-02-22T17:43:00.000-06:00

i have been visiting and enjoying the poetry thursday site. here's my poem for this thursday-fitting my sense of longing for spring. "a single green sprouting thing would restore me" indeed!

February: Thinking of Flowers
by Jane Kenyon

Now wind torments the field,
turning the white surface back
on itself, back and back on itself,
like an animal licking a wound.
Nothing but white--the air, the light;
only one brown milkweed pod
bobbing in the gully, smallest
brown boat on the immense tide.
A single green sprouting thing
would restore me. . . .
Then think of the tall delphinium,
swaying, or the bee when it comes
to the tongue of the burgundy lily.

black and white memories..(self portrait tues)

2007-02-20T21:53:00.000-06:00

april 1964...ten years old. i remember this day and the happiness of doing cartwheels in the parking lot of the national food store next to my house. some sensations/experiences do not fade away.

eye am (spc)

2007-02-15T10:30:00.000-06:00

oddly connected

2007-02-07T07:45:00.000-06:00

i gather so many treasures while traveling on my favorite blogs...one leads to another...then i'll follow a comment to the source, finding something unexpected... for instance, zach braff mentioned "I implore anyone reading this to immediately make plans to go see the new Broadway show, "Spring Awakening". It is the most inspiring piece of art I have seen in far too long. I have yet to lead you astray thus far. You will be blown away!
It's about growing up and loneliness and puberty and sex and lust and struggling not to drowned in an ocean of other people's opinions about who you're supposed to be. It's like "Dead Poet's Society" on extacy set to music. It is quite simply a masterpiece.
call 212 239-6200 for tickets. Trust me." i did check it and love the idea and from this video piece it looks incredible.the music is staying with me all day(always a sign of a good musical for me) i then i ventured over to wenda's and her quotes about "possibilities" seemed like a notion far different from the angst of the video, however, it is simply another human sensation. after discussing "life" last night, with my amazing son of 17 years i felt both those very sensations(angst and possibilities).

spc-black and white (in a gray world)

2007-02-06T14:19:00.000-06:00

"you wander from room to room, hunting for the diamond necklace...that is already around your neck!"~ jalal-uddin rumi

monday mood- content

2007-02-05T09:26:00.000-06:00

today, as i saw the word at moody monday "content" i spent some time contemplating my understanding of the concept.... from last week feeling off center -all i can say is "what a difference a day makes". at this moment i am content. with all the feelings and that includes the uncomfortable painful ones.(though i do admit to a preference for feeling good!) actually, i am getting the movement that proceeds many of the difficult experiences earlier than in the past.(yea!!)

it began many years ago...........

2007-02-02T19:45:00.000-06:00

i had been feeling cynical the last few days- tired of other peoples opinions and statements made in certainty...as though anyone really knows a "right" way. it was an uncomfortable sensation, i felt my expression becoming artificial and blank. in my womens group today, i was able to recognize how defensive that posture can be. i remembered, (with support) that i had been disregarding my own intuition, and when i listen to my self and trust that i am entitled to my own way of seeing things, that is enough. i don't have to have proof or understand -it simply is. i sadly remembered how young i was when i first began to silence my intuition, my knowing, and even stopped paying attention to what my body was signaling - fear, and not knowing another way, stopped me cold . it seems enough right now to just assure the little girl in me that i, as a woman can do things differently now with the choices and intentions i am aware of today.

peace march in washington dc.

2007-01-30T20:13:00.000-06:00

i am amazed at how many people gathered to voice opposition to the escalation of troops in iraq. we rallied with the organization called codepink. i was inspired by the speakers- who in some cases, risk their careers. i was moved by the military families and veterans who are shunned by some for taking a stance against the war. but as jane fonda mentioned "silence is no longer an option". i was surprised by how little press coverage was actually reviewed the next day -and i heard the washington post did not run the story. the crowd was peaceful, even though a small group taunted from across the street with signs of "go to hell traitors"and had a hanging effigy. it was a long day, flying out at 6am and home at 10pm. may this war come to an end soon.

spc-" using my voice"

2007-01-25T14:02:00.000-06:00

to continue with the self portrait challenge of new year intentions....i recommit to using my voice. this is an ongoing struggle at times, but one i truly am invested in! my relationships personally, and how i interact in the world depend on the courage i can draw up and bring forth. this weekend, i will march in washington d.c., to use my voice to oppose the escalation and war in iraq. check out other intentions here.

happy birthday dear nathan

2007-01-24T08:46:00.000-06:00

20 years ago today, my world took on another dimension- that of mother. so january 24th is a day of great significance. another's needs began to direct my own. let me tell you a little about nate, he is indomitable -one who can never be kept down. his greatest strengths (which are also his weaknesses) are intensity, enthusiasm,and a big heart.(and quite handsome too!) though lately i have called him a smoke and mirrors master i know he has time to mature and will. my birthday wish for him is to develop patience and humility. here's to you my son!! happy happy day.

"thank you sheri"

2007-01-20T19:20:00.000-06:00

we gathered to celebrate her life, and grieve her parting....here's to you my friend and all you taught me.

when you knew you where dying and showed such grace this warren zevon song took on such power for me....you helped me remember that i am also preparing to depart this earth.
Keep Me In Your Heart( Lyrics by waren zevon and jorge calderon)

Shadows are falling and I’m running out of breath

Keep me in your heart for awhile
If I leave you it doesn’t mean I love you any less

Keep me in your heart for awhile
When you get up in the morning and you see that crazy sun

Keep me in your heart for while
There’s a train leaving nightly called when all is said and done

Keep me in your heart for while
Sha-la-la-la-la-la-la-li-li-loKeep me in your heart for while
Sha-la-la-la-la-la-la-li-li-loKeep me in your heart for while
Sometimes when you’re doing simple things around the houseMaybe you’ll think of me and smile
You know I’m tied to you like the buttons on your blouse

Keep me in your heart for while
Hold me in your thoughts, take me to your dreamsTouch me as I fall into viewWhen the winter comes keep the fires litAnd I will be right next to you
Engine driver’s headed north to Pleasant Stream

Keep me in your heart for while
These wheels keep turning but they’re running out of steam

Keep me in your heart for while
Sha-la-la-la-la-la-la-li-li-loKeep me in your heart for while
Sha-la-la-la-la-la-la-li-li-loKeep me in your heart for while
Keep me in your heart for while.