mayseek life


Friday, October 26, 2007


after spending awhile in a state of uncomfortable judging of others(specifically my family) i was able to get past the guilt of feeling not compassionate enough and took myself down to the beach for a few moments to see if things would ease. i have had many insights and found answers to my uncertanties at this place before -and again, did find relief in the colors and sensations i experienced there. i found i couldn't hold on to the stories i was clinging to and fully take in the experience of what i was seeing at the same time. i actually felt the shifting of one experience(the visual earth) to the next( the story of my family). i again realized my choice to be with either one. and by spending time in the pleasurable grounding sensations of the beach i also was able to remember the spirits of my family and know the "stories " are changing and they are so much more than the current circumstances.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

i (heart) new york

you'll have to believe me -here's jon stewart helping his young son pick out a book at barnes&noble in union square park. i couldn't get closer without feeling like a paparazzo. hard to say what came over me-i watch him nightly on the daily show and appreciate his humor - i was surprised that i was the only one seeming to get excited. we had a great few days in new york, with weather in the upper 70's - skaters breezed through puddles at rockefeller plaza. good for walking, sitting and people watching. one more quick trip this weekend to indiana university- we will pack a lot into one day...... i have tickets to see the dali lama who will speak at the school from noon til two -then watch nate play baseball at four- then turn it around for the 4 hour trip home.
my darling cousin arrives from sydney with her daughters on sunday, and i'm already giddy with anticipation!!

Friday, October 12, 2007

"real life" -photo friday

moving through life..........

Thursday, October 11, 2007

understanding and actions i recently watched this interesting show where charlie rose interviewed sean penn and eddie vedder with regards to the movie "into the wild". i'd heard of the book,but after this interveiw had to run out and get it. i read the book quickly( found it hard to put down) and it has given me much to ponder- don't have many answers to the questions it raises for me but it got me curious and excited about the choices one makes that determine their lifestyle.
i then read "
catcher in the rye", as that escaped me in high school-i don't know how since it seems like it is a mandatory read. i was moved by the different perspective/ mindset of "holden" when i was still comsumed with the "chris mccandless" attitude and way of experiencing the world( from the former book). i can't wait to see the movie "into the wild" ..... (the photo of sean penn was taken at the march on wasington dc earlier this year)

Monday, October 08, 2007

easing suffering.....

this past weekend, i was fortunate to attend a seminar by dzigar kongtrul rinpoche at the beautiful shamhbala mountain center in colodado. my spiritual life continues to grow with the teachings i have heard from the shamhbala organization, and teachers like pema chodron and sakyong mipham rinpoche. the opportunity to listen and comtemplate his words and meditate for long periods of time was a treat. i had some issues with the rituals that groups follow - reminds me of the catholic grammar school and church i attended many years ago. as i return to my real world, i immediately get many chances to observe my knee-jerk reactions to others and experiences in my life. the area of red feather lake was 2.5 hours northeast of denver and 2000ft higher! i struggled with some altitude headaches but the landscape was gorgeous and worth it. experienced cold evenings and expected snow. today in chicago it is 87 degrees -a new record high.